Fear is a feeling, not a fact

By Tami Bonnell, CEO, EXIT Realty Corp. International

There are an awful lot of people who are afraid to jump out and try something new or jump in and sell. But fear is a feeling, not a fact, and often the thing we fear can be turned into an opportunity instead.

Recently during a conversation with one of the strongest salespeople I know, she confessed, “I hate cold calling”. And by hate, she meant fear. I asked her to consider what would happen if, instead of selling, she decided to simply have a conversation instead. What if she asked effective questions, and followed up by adding value?  I asked if she did this, might she eventually have an opportunity to do business with them? She lit up like a Christmas tree. In that moment, her entire cold calling paradigm shifted, and her fear dissolved. She told me I changed the whole trajectory of her business and her life.

I’ve always believed that if I could be the solution for whomever is in front of me and if I could add value to their life in some way, it might lead to an opportunity to do business with them or someone they know.  Being the solution might involve giving them a book that would help them to get unstuck or perhaps forwarding a link to an article about a health issue they’re experiencing. It doesn’t matter what it is as long as it adds value.

Telling yourself you’re just going to have a conversation and discover where you can add value alleviates the pressure of looking at everyone as a potential paycheck. If you ask enough of the right effective questions, you’re always going to have something to do, something to sell, and you will always have an opportunity. But first, you must have the right mindset.

I don’t know what we’re afraid of. People are just people. I haven’t had anybody mow me down yet! It’s a whole lot easier to sell when you’re not selling. When you’re simply searching for common ground, asking effective questions and giving them what they want on the other side, opportunities to do business together will present themselves.  This is true whether you’re a regional owner who really wants to help people achieve dreams, see the big picture and leave a legacy, a broker who wants to build the best office in town, give back to the community and show agents a better future, or an agent who wants to make listing and showing properties one of the best experiences their client has ever had. If we’re focused on the fear behind selling rather than on having conversations and delivering value through exceptional experiences, we’re focused on the feelings and not the facts.  We’re focused on lack and not prosperity, and that’s when we end up losing.

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